It has been a while, Tumblr.
I’ve been trying to enjoy my time off from school but, in reality, I haven’t been able to fully enjoy it all the time.
Tomorrow, I’m starting therapy again for a little while longer than I expected to do. Everything is so screwed up and I don’t want to deal with this any longer. My name has officially been referred to the honor council at school, so I’m endlessly scared, even though that in my heart, God and I both know that I did not do what I have been accused of. I feel like my future is so much more uncertain than it was before any of this. At least then I had somewhat of a plan. I am still going to apply to Loyola since I don’t need to send in my GRE scores (WHICH WERE SO AWFUL) and only need one letter of recommendation (thanks, Ash) and the application is not due until June for the Fall. At least then I can get some things and ideas together.
I love my new job, however. It is going to be such an amazing experience for me, not to mention it is completely different than anything I have ever done before now. Thankfully, I will be able to work full time during the summer at this place, so I’ll be able to save up some money of my own and look for another full time job to help me out if I don’t end up getting into graduate school.
Honestly, I don’t think that I even want to go into counseling anymore. It’s definitely something that I am interested in and would like to get into as a career, but it wouldn’t keep me happy for the rest of my life. The only time I am happy is when I am baking in the kitchen. I want to own my own bakery and continue to experiment and learn on my own with new recipes and flavors and tasty ideas for people to love. I would even be satisfied doing my own business out of my own kitchen because, let’s face it, opening up a store is a lot of work… and money. I looked up baking and pastry courses online a few weeks ago, but I don’t think I would want to do a formal education with that. I feel like baking is something that just comes naturally and you really need to have a certain love for it outside of a classroom. I’ve truly decided that opening my own baking business is where I want my life to go.
I’m hoping that 2012 brings me a few things, including: graduating in the Spring as I was supposed to do, making a lot of money, saving up a lot of money, spending as much time with my family, friends, and boyfriend as possible, singing a lot more and writing music, making every attempt at starting my own baking business, PUTTING ON A SMILING FACE AND A POSITIVE ATTITUDE NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS… and genuinely being happy.
